Impressing others, attracting others, wanting others to accept us, to approve of us…it’s something we focus on all the time. We want people to like us. To love us. To want to work with us in business. To approve of our choices. To give us confirmation that we’re doing things in an acceptable way. For some people, wanting other people’s approval can be all consuming. And quite frankly, it’s totally exhausting.
I got an email the other day that said this:
“Do you have any tips for getting over a guy? I thought I was going to marry him. I’ve been feeling really depressed.”
I found myself instinctively writing this back:
“My advice would be to focus on making yourself the best YOU you can be. I would have faith that the right man for you will come along when you’re standing fully in your truth, and when you impress yourself daily with how incredible you are. He will show up then, and not a moment sooner. Until then – get clear on what the best version of you is — and become her. Everything you want will be attracted to that energy like a magnet.”
After I pressed “send,” I thought about this concept more and more. I realized something pretty powerful:
Every time I’ve ever gotten a new job or business opportunity, it was at a time when I was really impressing myself with my work.
Every time I’ve ever attracted a new relationship into my life, it was at a time when I felt awesome and was attractive to myself.
Every time I’ve ever gotten the genuine approval of others, it was at a time when I completely approved of myself.
Every time I’ve ever had truly great things happen in life, it wasn’t because I was manipulating or trying as hard as possible to impress or attract other people, or “make them see me in a certain way.” It was because I already saw myself in the most positive way and it was impossible for other people to NOT feel that.
If you take the focus off of impressing others and work on being impressive to yourself, it changes the whole game.
When you get clear on who YOU really are, what makes you feel alive and amazing, and take steps to really step into that, to become that version of yourself, the whole world responds more favorably, and you feel more authentic and passionate about your life. In fact, magical things that you probably never would have even expected for yourself will show up.
I love this quote:
“Don’t ask yourself what the world needs. Ask yourself what makes you come alive and then go do that. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.” – Howard Thurman
So forget trying so hard to impress other people all the time.
Imagine what it would be like to be the you that impresses YOU.
And get on it.